Katie Maloney explained that her decision to separate from Tom Schwartz had been “building up” for months and wasn’t a decision made overnight.

“I felt disconnected, I felt like I was drifting away further and further away,” she said on Friday’s episode of her “You’re Going to Love Me” podcast.

The “Vanderpump Rules” star, 35, confessed that she knew her choice would “crush him.”

“I felt like I was drifting and I couldn’t stop it,” she continued, while seemingly tearing up and sniffling. “It was the hardest hardest thing to do. The hardest thing to tell him, because I knew it was gonna crush him.”

Maloney added that in no way was it an “abrupt” decision on her end, and they have been separated for a little over a month.

“I know [for] some people [it] may seem like a shock or it may seem like an abrupt thing, but for us it’s not like we just decided this this week or yesterday or the day before,” Maloney said. “It’s been emotional for sure, but it’s also been in ways peaceful and loving and the transition so far is going really well.”

The former SURver also revealed that neither one of them has moved out of their Village Valley home yet.

“We do still live together in our house, and we’re just trying to navigate these steps together and really work on becoming friends in that sense, and obviously we have the same friends and trying to hang out in a group together going through this and not making it awkward for anyone and not making anyone choose sides – that’s been important to us,” she said, referring to their shared “Pump Rules” friend group.

As for why she decided to call it quits, Maloney explained that she needed to prioritize herself and her happiness more than their relationship and their future.

“There wasn’t some kind of crazy incident that happened, there wasn’t some crazy fight that resulted in this,” she continued. “The best and only way I can describe it is just like waking up inside of my life and having this voice that just became louder and louder and just events in my life and our relationship coming into focus and feeling the weight of them on me. ”

Maloney emphasized that the two have no “resentment” or “animosity” towards one another.

The ex-Bubbas announced their split after nearly 12 years together in separate Instagram statements Tuesday night. Since then, both Maloney and Schwartz have been spotted out and about, with Schwartz, 39, still wearing his wedding band.

The Bravolebrities began dating in September 2010 and tied the knot in front of Bravo cameras in August 2016. After losing their marriage license, they threw off to Las Vegas to get legally married in front of close friends in July 2019.